Shocking new photos have emerged of a Quidditch player from the local team the ‘Holsworthy hardypuffs’ stuck on the roof of the Holsworthy school of witchcraft and wizardry. The unnamed quidditch player apparently got stuck after chasing a ‘Quaffle’ around by Dave Millmans back door, and up on to the roof of the […]
The Holsworthy mafia can finally reveal the true purpose of the 147 different recycling boxes and bags we have been ordered to use the last few months. After spending approximately 23hrs 42 mins and 23 secs a week sorting our rubbish into the correct containers, we all wait with baited breath on collections day […]
***Breaking**** The Holsworthy mafia can exclusively reveal that Vandals have started destroying Fore street in Holsworthy. Our inept reporter ‘peter’ was going for a kebab at KJ’s, when he caught these despicable criminals in the act. In a brazen act of vandalism not seen since the whole bus shelter graffiti […]
In what experts are calling the crime of the century, a local business has had its signage stolen (or misplaced). The white sign that usually hangs at the entrance to the pannier arcade has not been seen in a week. Now absolutely no local agencies believe it may never return, and has probably left […]
In a move that shocked absolutely no one today, Theresa may announced that she was giving up on negotiations with the EU and was instead going to challenge Starlord from the fictitious Marvel universe, to a ‘Dance off’ for the Power stone. She believes that with one of the six infinity stones, she will […]
