Holsworthy held an election last night (November 8th) for the position of Supreme Leader of the Galactic Empire (or Torridge district councillor as some people call it). After an intense battle where absolutely no blood was spilled, the vote came right down to the wire. Out of a 3542 possible voters, 1241 actually voted, […]
In news that has come as a complete shock to us here at the Holsworthy Mafia, we can confirm that there will indeed be fireworks let off in multiple locations tonight ( November 5th). This news came out of the blue as many people had just presumed that fireworks had been banned this […]
Village idiots. Every Hamlet, village, town, and city has them. You know, the useless waste of semen that immediately spring to mind whenever there is juicy gossip doing the rounds. These are the bellends that have been kicked out of the local boozer for picking a fight with the fruit machine, and have then […]
Holsworthy is truly awesome in so many ways, from our lovely little market to its people. Sometimes however, people start bickering and bitching. Normally things blow over within 5 minutes, but this afternoon, a development of grey moods has appeared on non other, Holsworthy Moan & Grown. A massive statement was posted by a concerned […]
We the Holsworthy Mafia have been mulling many things over the last few weeks and one thing the town is missing is a Tesco, but we’re never going to get that, so we’ve settled for 80s Euro Pop band called… Micropenis & the Lady Boys. The bands lead singer will be non other, the man […]
