News & Stories from the Holsworthy Mafia

The don refused toilet access at Cousins Cafe

Today, the don was refused access to the toilet by a female staff member at the Corner Cafe. This news comes as a shock because the Don and Mr Cousins where good childhood friends and once played hide and seek as children.

The don will be releasing a statement regarding the current situation explaining that the Corner Cafes toilers SHOULD be for public use, after all, how are all the homeless people going to pee and poop?

Theres also talks of a town referendum in the near future regarding the matter.

IF

A spokesperson for the Corner Cafe had this to say:

We dont like non customers using our toilets because of rising living costs, for instance, cost of powering the 8w energy saving light bulbs and the cost of our premium toilet roll, its all things we reserve for our loyal customers and therefore, non paying customers must use the public toilets near the bus shelter in Holsworthy opposite the church.

The Holsworthy Mafia are in current discussions with all members to see what can be done to help fund the toilet roll and light bulb funds to make the toilets available for future non customers of Holsworthy.

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Updated: July 15, 2016 — 2:02 pm
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