News & Stories from the Holsworthy Mafia

DUTCH inspired “coffee shop” opening in Holsworthy


Holsworthy Mafia have heard rumours that a new Dutch inspired coffee shop is opening up in Holsworthy. It comes as the Green Elephant in the room was evicted from Holsworthy, shutting down the traditional supply of the much loved 5 leaved money tree we have come to appreciate so much.

The new coffee shop will of course sell coffee products infused with Hollands finest herbal remedies. We spoke to the manager Robert Marley who had this to say:

Sweet, yeah, man, peace, this is long awaited for Holsworthy dude.

Studies have shown that local food businesses will benefit once the coffee shop has opened, especially those who sell Doritos, Chicken Nuggets and Bacon Sandwiches, or even just bacon.

The shop, made of multiple stories will open the Dutch inspired room only when Sergeant Angle isn’t riding his Cycle around town.

The Holsworthy Mafia have this to say:

Its great that we’re getting a new source of this marvellous herb. Since the Green Elephant in the room was evicted at 3PM on the 21st, the towns supply dropped dramatically leaving Holsworthy high and dry by the 7PM, on the 21st.

We of course welcome any new business in Holsworthy, and since this Coffee Shop is opening, we’re going to be discussing with the manager “Robert” about having a Columbia Coffee themed room funded by our completely legal mafia activities.

The Holsworthy Mafia wish this new venture all the best.



Updated: July 1, 2018 — 9:07 pm
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