News & Stories from the Holsworthy Mafia

Colombian product distribution in CHAOS after staff member banishment

colombian coffeeHi, fellow Mafia members.

Whilst we pride ourselves on our premium Removal, disposal and Gardening services we have one jewel in our crown that we are most proud off.

So it is with a heavy heart, that we the Holsworthy Mafia issue the following statement.

From the Don:

Our local “boy racing” community has long been one of our main agents when it comes to our Latte/Mocha/Cappuccino distribution. We have often relied on them to collect and then deliver our premium Colombian “coffee”… However it has come to our attention that one of their drivers (as witnessed by fellow Holsworthy Mafia member ‘Pete “small-hands” McGee’) has been driving around Holsworthy in a shite car, with the motoring skills of a toddler (It has also been noted that he listens to alot of Spice Girls & Taylor Swift in his shite wagon).

Obviously we can not have this kind of youthful high jinx impact on our sterling reputation and As such we the Holsworthy mafia have no option but to disavow Jim “Eileen” Smith and banish him to the wilds of Sutcombe.




Peter ‘ 1 toe ‘ Griffen



PS: Will all other boy racers please remember that our next collection is 10pm tomorrow in the memorial hall car park, it’ll be dropped by drone. :)



Updated: March 29, 2018 — 3:50 pm
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